Thailand : Chiang Mai : Trekking

A lot of research went into our trek. We talked to a whole load of people, including one extremely irritating eco-warrior who we then kept bumping into around town. We had to invent a way of asking "Do the natives wear the pretty outfits?" without asking "Do the natives wear the pretty outfits?"... In the end we went of the MOST touristy trek - it sounded the FUNNEST.
We started out at an out-of-town market with diverse delicacies - such as frogs on skewers and deep fried bugs. We were pestered for a good half hour by a native girl to buy a water bottle holder for 40 baht. She actually got angry with us for not buying it. Since she was so small and cute, I thought this was hilarious. I also almost tripped over her several times - she was so short she didn't quite enter my field of view. This added to the anger/hilarity.
We drove. Thirteen of us, crammed into the back of a pick-up with three days food - predominantly garlic.
The conversation was predominantly FOOTBALL - why is everyone so obsessed? I thought things might be different outside Britain. Jean-Pierre was a French guy who managed somehow to look like a rugged desert guide, despite his campy mannerisms. He was travelling in interesting circumstances with a girl who wasn't his girlfriend.
We formed the CONVERSATIONAL ALLIANCE AGAINST FOOTBALL, were triumphant and swung the conversation to POLITICS: education and tax-rates across Europe. Most Europeans are PAID to go to University, however they also pay higher taxes, have to join the army for a year and can be called up at any time after training.
Two was a great guide - always making fun and giving us little asides into Thai and Hill Tribe culture.
He looked very jaunty in his rice-picker hat as he raced us up steep mudslides. The tight-knit bamboo tunnels ruffled our hair and sprinkled us with bugs. I have come to loathe bugs and their bites, and take pleasure in CRUSHING BUG DEATH - smearing their remains across my palm to extract my own blood.
Two was very much a local - and took great delight in revealing to us his turf and inside knowledge. He took us to a beautiful waterfall - all jutting rocks and sparkling spray. Liv and I splashed on and under the fall itself. The water was cool and shallow, it thumped our heads and backs leaving us bruised and deaf...but refreshed!
We strode on - to the "miraculous" hot spring. The water sploshed angrily and warned off fingers with intense heat. The rocks were furry with rich minerals, boiling water exuded from every rock orifice. I wanted to cook something - but we only had Pringles.
Pringles have become a rare delicacy, a visceral respite from Thai food.
We climbed the worn steps of the path through knitted bamboo. It felt as if we were ascending the labyrinthine tunnels of a cathedral spire. We emerged into the sparse mountaintop jungle and a snaking red path cut into the hillside. The evening light cut through the overhanging trees, making the myriad leaves sparkle a la "Doors to Perception".
We worked through meandering paths and teetered across rivers. Signs of habitation slowly poked out of the vegetation. Split bamboo channels led 'fresh' water and us to the White Karen village.
The tribe derive their name from their virgins, who wear white woven outfits - practical but gorgeous in a earthy way.
The village was beautiful in a haphazard way - chickens and pigs ran about a handful of bamboo houses on stilts. The seemingly scattered plants were all purposeful - bearing fruits or medicines.
The buildings were dead simple - a room each for sleeping, cooking and eating; and a balcony for work (like weaving or preparing rice). No toilet/bathroom - this was shared among the whole village!
Two cooked us a fantastic meal - a yellow curry with chicken, a pork soup and sweet & sour tofu; all served with sticky rice and all cooked using only two woks.
I was feeling extremely ill, so fell asleep as soon as my belly was full. I missed an interesting chat with Two. Apparently Thais worship a mixture of Buddhism and Hinduism - therefore they actively worship the Buddha, and also their ancestors and sometimes the monarchy!
I thankfully also missed the three Swiss girls who were trekking with us attempting to play the guitar. "Take me home, country roads" was all they knew, we heard it many times. Perhaps "Kum-by-yah" would've added some variety.